Creative Chemicals...a.k.a. Seriously Mom? Instructions?

One of my most favorite Christmas moments each year generally happens after the holidays, sometimes the first week of the following year. My college roomie and I meet at a Mexican restaurant in a tiny town halfway between our Kentucky towns. We bring our kids...her boys, my girls...and a few gifts to exchange. This year was no exception. (And included a side trip to the Dollar Store and Wal-Mart in search of a dog bed...because we are just that classy!)
As our annual adventures always begin, I call my roomie's cell phone when I know I'm fairly close to where I need to be, letting her know that ONCE AGAIN I am officially lost between a field and a farm with no street signs in sight. She uses her navigational system to locate us and "talk us in" to the restaurant. (We seriously need to purchase and install some type of tracking device on my car...)
In a spirit of, well, cowardice, I had already shipped our Christmas gift to the boys: a Pokemon game that involves catapulting marbles at your opponent. (I figured if I let the kids open it during our lunch visit, the game might mysteriously end up back in my car trunk.)Same situation with the Pirate Swords I shipped last year, anyhooooo...
My roomie gave the girls what they have wanted for ages: Chemistry Sets. Real live chemicals and test tubes and experiment instructions. The Bug and the Pea were thrilled, beyond thrilled. On the way home, the test tubes were opened and examined, the chemicals were organized, a game plan emerged.
Before I could hang up my coat in the closet, the kids had transformed the kitchen table into a laboratory. I looked over in time to see the Pea's hiney sticking out of my kitchen cabinet, bowls and pans being grabbed, right and left. The Bug held a ginormous mixing bowl under the faucet and was filling it to the brim. The Pea discovered where I hid the food coloring and added it the chemical collection.
I called my roomie to let her know (surprisingly) that we did make it home OK, on the first try, no detours or confusion. I also thanked her for the craziness formerly known as my kitchen.
I located the instructions for each science lesson and placed them in the center of the table. The Bug looked over at me, "Seriously Mom? Instructions?" I found the experiment the Bug was working on: add one cup of water to a disposable bowl. "Sweetie, it says to add one cup of water, you've added about a gallon..."
"Hellooooo! Mom! Adding more can only make it better," replied the Bug as she poured in the last of my red food coloring.
I glanced over to the other side of the kitchen table, the Pea was squirting blue ink on her brand new cream colored sweater. (I tried not to gasp audibly...brand new clothes are a rarity in our household...did I mention I was cheap?)"Look Mommy!" squealed the Pea, "Magic Disappearing Ink!" I kept waiting for said ink to disappear. Waiting, waiting, waiting.
The Bug had moved on to Experiment 2. She poured out a test tube of teeny tiny round colored balls into a bowl of (you guessed it) a ginormous amount of water. The balls swelled, and swelled, and swelled until they were the size of marbles. The Bug stuck her hand into the container and grabbed the gel-like balls. "LOOK!" she shrieked, and tripped on the coat she had earlier tossed on the floor. The gel marbles went flying, landing in the sink, the stove, the candle holders, a picture frame or two. The Pea - in her newly blue speckled sweater - started stepping on the balls that hit the floor. Squoosh, squoosh, squoosh. Sweet merciful heavens. Deep breath.
One by one, the test tubes were explored, chemicals tested, acidity discovered, crystals grown. We couldn't have read the instructions, even if we'd wanted to, because by now they were covered with water and food dye...and some squooshed gel marbles.
The Bug and the Pea gathered some plastic bags to "store" all of their new creations. And their timing was super, because in walked Daddy from work. I'd like to say he was surprised that the table wasn't already set for dinner, but he knows me better than that! I'd much rather the kids be up to their ears in an painty art project or a muddy gardening project than worry about whether my kitchen is spotless at 5:30. The Bug and the Pea pounced on him with hugs and kisses, gel marbles and disappearing ink! He had no choice but to laugh at their enthusiasm.
"Pizza anyone?" I offered and I grabbed the phone...